A Free Shot
By: Bill the Butcher
Russia has been pulling a bluff since the end of WWII. Ignoring the involvement of the whole freaking world it laid claim to the ultimate victory. Then it raced around sewing discord, trying to share its Bolshevik Revolution with anyone stupid enough to listen. Then the whole thing blew up and like a cheap GPS they had to recalculate. Eventually they came upon Putin who looked good in a suit and was real good with poison. After several years they jumped on the Ukraine, but when the Ukraineians began towing their tanks off with tractors Putin threatened nuclear war, completely forgetting that they couldn’t drop a bomb right in their own back yard. Finally, as an added attraction they captured basketball star Brittney Griner during a layover on her way back to the states! They caught The Tater!
Now, I laughed my butt off when they nabbed her. Apparently Ms Griner had .07 of a gram of cannabis oil in her luggage for pain she suffers from her basketball career, and if you understand that you will understand that she was out of dope! Big international incident. Its has all the right components. She’s black, or mostly black, she’s gay and married to a female, and she’s a hop head. Is there anything I missed?
But Russia was on it! They couldn’t beat the tap dancing president of Ukraine but maybe they could beat a black chick from Houston who can make rim shots. I don’t know the effectiveness of marijuana for pain (I drink whiskey for mine) but the graduate of Nimitz High in Houston was using it and even had a prescription from the Cheech and Chong Research Institute. One thing for sure, sitting in that cage in the courtroom she’s certainly not buzzed now, Ollie!
Her wife, oh I love this because Russians are allergic to gays, pleaded with Biden to intercede on her behalf but Biden found out that Brittney was over thirteen years old and took off to a Bar Mitzvah in Jerusalem and a stop over to do a fist bump with a prince in Saudi Arabia. Sucks to be you, Brittney. Black lives don’t seem to matter much in Moscow.
You know what’s coming. Russia has a card up their sleeve. There’s some arms dealer we’ve been water boarding since Jesus was a corporal and he owes Putin money. So, they will parlay a deal to sell ol’ basketball queen to us for this gun dealer. Now the gun dealer is really not that important. This is all about saving face. Putin was so mad the last time he allowed video of himself that he was shaking like Al Sharpton at a Klan rally. He’s got to come up with something or he might end up at the bottom of some well like Tzar Nicolas and his family back in ‘17. 1917! He’s at the last minute of his game and hopes to get a free shot!
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This article (A Free Shot) is republished by contribution with attribution to the author Bill the Butcher and The Butcher Shop.
About The Author: Bill the Butcher is the purveyor of The Butcher Shop which is a collection of independent writers ranging from journalists to op/ed, from conservative to liberal. Whatever cut of literary meat you prefer the Butcher Shop is here to serve.
Images Credit: Photo in Featured Image (top) – “Brittney Griner” by Lorie Shaull is licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0. – All other in-article images from original article
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