Baby Girls & The Making Of … “THE PUCK”

By: Bill the Butcher

As my granddaughter progresses through stardom trips from Nashville to Austin have become necessary to work the wheels involved in climbing the ladder of fortune and fame. During this time I have defined several life hacks needed to maneuver the twisted road to success in the attempt to achieve success without having to resort to work which is an oxymoron if there ever was one! These observations are not hard and fast, but they are all there for anyone set on walking off their steady job in search of the glitter of stage and stardom so for those interested in this please read on.

All grandfathers believe their granddaughter is the prettiest, smartest, and most talented female since Shirley Temple. It goes without saying that this psychosis will cause you to hallucinate and see the little knock-kneed, buck-toothed clumsy toddler as Aphrodite! The mission, should you choose to accept it, is to try to convince other poor dumb baby boomers that this is as accurate as a Trump speech. You voted for Trump so you can see this mindset is as contagious as COVID in Beijing!

I, myself was a victim of this virus. I first saw Karrie (The Puck) on January 16, 2007. She was ten minutes old. I held her in my arms, and she stuck her tongue out at me. From that moment on I was her slave. Her first appearance was on YouTube. She crawled up onto a Rumba vacuum and became one of the first Rumba Babies. Personally I think she had more style than any of the hundreds that would follow. Yippi Ki Yi PaPa!

And so she grew. They do that, you know. She had four brothers, but I didn’t notice them at first. If you have a girl daughter or granddaughter she quickly becomes installed as Girl Baby! Boys? Well, they’re there, and you have to feed them, that’s the law! But Girl Baby reigns supreme. And the brothers will hate life! Girl Baby gets the softest bed. She gets the biggest pork chop, and if you think Jesus was sinless you ain’t met Girl Baby yet. If she poops on the floor her brothers have to clean it up.

So how did a spoiled brat become a star? Well, she will always be your star, you just had to convince everyone else. Puck’s mother had been an early YouTube star. Nothing spectacular, but a few clicks and a father in law who saw her as another Judy Garland. Then she had Girl Baby and my neurosis became complete!

I knew from the internet that if iJackie was a pseudo star then Puck, by simple law of evolution would be a Super Star. She had to be! I mean she had the looks, the DNA, and the attitude. Now, simple child psychology: Tell any given little girl she is a gift from heaven (Which frankly the all are!) and you have Megan on steroids sans homicidal tendencies. To be honest, Puck did have inborn talent because she was expected to. She learned to read at an early age by reading screenplays, which she acted out. She was “TicToking” almost constantly and her hair and makeup were perfect when she was fresh out of diapers. Yeah makeup. . . deal with it!

Actors are not like us. They are born, not made. They are sent to show us things that make life easier for us mere mortals to understand. There is a responsibility to avoid misleading the public because the public believes! They want to believe. They have to believe, and those chosen to be in the saddle of the Unicorn have the charge to give them something to believe in! Without faith life becomes meaningless, and belief and faith fills in the blanks.

And I believed, and still believe in Puck. At first no one could see what I saw, but as time went by, she began to glow, and by chance or design a star was born! She began to do radio, then TV, and now movies. All things come to an end though. As she grew, and learned, and became self aware, people in the industry began to notice what I’d known all along. And one day I had to hand Girl Baby to the world. Enjoy the show.

Karrie “The Puck”