The Monster [Weekend Special from Bill The Butcher]

The Monster

How five articles went from Monster to the DAYUM factor

A weekend Special by The Butcher Shop, a (TLB) Contributor 


Come here, Imma gonna told you something. Gonna teach you about The Monster today! Instead of my usual review of the week, I’m going to put up for your reading pleasure, five of my articles you may, or may not have seen from the five hundred sum odd pieces the Tea Party Tribune has been kind enough to publish for me over the last three years.

When you write an article you tend to think it’s a masterpiece. I bury “Easter Eggs” in every one. A good example of that is in “New Baby and The Trip To Bountiful,” where in one line I replaced “The Principal” with the words “The Principle” alluding to polygamy. It got by a lot of people but the principal who let my grandson go skipping across Main Street in Brigham City got my point, and he’s been mad ever since. Sorry for Party rocking Dude! I also include at least one mistake for liberals who search my stuff to challenge my literacy. An it’s for its or a comma for a period.

For every fifty to one hundred articles that are penned, one will be the “monster!” While on a typical run an article will struggle for reads, these certain works will take off a bit faster. Then you’ll notice a comment later on that article, but not from the Trib. It’ll come from USA Today, or some other publication where part or all of the article was used or cited. That’s when you go back and check the numbers and said article will move into the “DAYUM” section. These five are those types of works.

I didn’t learn journalism in any college. I learned to spin a yarn in Nashville. The same methods that make a song “cook” will chicken fry an article. Methods like make a point and return to it toward the end to reinforce the theme. Don’t keep repeating “ands” and “buts.” Write like you speak. I don’t have a big problem with spelling because I’m ignorant and don’t use a whole lot of big words. I try not to lie . . . much, but I’ll use innuendo to worm around a subject or person (such as that principal) to make my point. FYI: The reason my five year old grand baby got out in the street unsupervised was he was too infatuated with a certain teacher. Little light hearted jab on an embarrassing era of Mormon history, add a dash of innuendo and voila! Principal soup! But you know I’m bad.

While I’m on that subject, I want to explain why I pick on Mormons so often. Even though I’m an old “Reptile Bait” I’ve been covered UP with Latter Day Saints for over thirty years. My wife’s and for that matter my daughter in law’s family are Temple Worthy all the way back to Joseph Smith. I did write Joseph Did You Know about the Mormon culture, and I’m fascinated with their history, but if I ever stepped into a Temple my hair would catch on fire. I use the same method when addressing race baiters, Political Correctness, and people who are confused by common sense.

I read my stuff out loud. That’s an old songwriter’s trick. My friends think I’m crazy because I always seem to be talking to myself. If  it won’t roll smoothly off your tongue it will irritate or confuse the reader. Finding subjects to write about is not hard. I can actually write about things I know very little of. When I began to write for Raging Elephants Radio on Doc Greene’s show I actually knew very little about the Texas movements of secession and nullification. In time I learned, but for about six months it was mostly style, style, style.

I do research. Usually on YouTube. I will sometimes spend up to a week familiarizing myself with a subject before I write anything about it. One subject I never could really cope with was the Flat Earth Society. I tried, but I simply couldn’t drink enough whiskey to make any sense out of it. I try not to rag on the Cartels or Muslims too much because I don’t want to get bombed or shot.

That all having been said, I think you will enjoy these pieces. Like a hit song I could feel them coming off my pen, so to speak. Each one directly addresses some facet of the human experience. Each one promoted itself to the “DAYUM” status. I don’t buy into inspiration but I will say these five came out of nowhere, so I guess there is someone out there looking out for us. It has been my honor and my joy to share with you guys and gals.

The Butcher




I (Infanticide) 1 : the killing of an infant 2 [Late Latin infanticida, from Latin infant-, infans + -i- + -cida -cide] : one who kills an infant Whenever you have mass murder there is always a perverse logic behind it. For those involved this logic relieves guilt and perpetuates the completion of the program … Continue reading

The Best Is Yet To Come

The Best Is Yet To Come That was Joe’s motto, and one of the last things he ever said to me while in his final trip to the VA in Temple, Texas. Joe was a retired Sargent Major, three bronze stars, a silver, and a purple heart, Vietnam. He was also married to my ex-wife, … Continue reading

The Pink Dragon

  Childhood diabetes is a pink dragon. Diabetes in and of itself is bad enough, but when a child begins life with no candy and cake it rears its ugly head on several fronts. As I sit here waiting the results of my granddaughter’s second hospital visit in two weeks I reflect. First, and foremost … Continue reading

New Baby and the Trip to Bountiful

The school day in Brigham City, Utah was like any other day. The autumn leaves were ablaze with color as the first taste of winter eased across the mountains, and the cool crisp air of the Rockies invigorated the populace. In an area steeped in tradition, the approaching holiday season filled it with anticipation of … Continue reading

The Unanswered Door


About (TLB) Contributor Bill and the gang at The Butcher Shop

The Butcher Shop is an alternative news source based in the Tea Party Tribune with an eye on God, family, and preservation of America. It is a collection of minds started by Bill the Butcher, a conservative op/ed journalist who began publishing forty years ago. We strive to make the articles informative, entertaining, and diverse. All you see will cause you to stop and consider. We try not to drone on with the same old day after day clap trap that may have driven you away from mainstream media. You will read things here that you will see nowhere else. We are from London to Austin to the Escalanté. So, what’s your cut of meat? Shop around. The Butcher Shop is happy to fill your order.


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