The Babylon Bee’s Predictions For 2021
It’s official: 2020 was the worst year ever, except for almost all the other years in human history! Will 2021 be a better year? Take a look at the Babylon Bee’s official list of infallible predictions and decide for yourself!
January 1 – New Year resolutions begin
January 5 – New Year resolutions downgraded
January 20 – Biden sworn in
January 21 – Biden dies of natural causes
January 22 – Trump announces 2024 presidential run
January 23 – 2024 Campaign kicks off
January 25 – Obama releases new memoir
January 27 – Feminists finally begin to reverse Handmaid’s Tale
February 1 – All remaining Trump supporters hunted down and executed
February 2 – Electoral college, First Amendment, Second Amendment, churches, and capitalism eliminated
February 3 – Democrats announce return to unity
February 26 – China officially annexes United States
March 1 – Pronouns must be tattooed on forehead or hand
March 3 – Space Force training exercise accidentally blows up the moon
March 6 – Elon Musk fixes moon
March 10 – Obama releases new memoir
March 21 – COVID 20 arrives
March 25 – FDA approves first permanent mask facial implant
April 1 – Cuomo hunts down remaining elderly in New York
April 19 – Steven Furtick announces he is the Messiah
May 5 – Elon Musk accepts Christ
May 6 – Joel Osteen accepts Christ
May 10 – Obama releases new memoir
June 6 – AOC tweets something dumb
July 3 – Kamala Harris forces gulag prisoners to make bricks without straw
August 15 – Netflix releases Cuties 2
September 5 – CHAZ 2 founded
September 6 – CHAZ 2 dismantled
October 1 – Beth Moore becomes Head Pastor of Christianity
October 8 – Obama releases new memoir
October 11 – ISIS takes over all of Canada
November 17 – Development complete on Cyberpunk 2077
December 10th – We finally find out what the squirrels have been up to
December 25 – Kamala Harris outlaws Christmas and becomes Empress of The World
December 27 – Obama releases new memoir
December 30 – Sydney Powell announces Kraken will finally be released next week
December 31 – Jesus returns
Yikes– looks like 2021 will be another doozy! Happy New Year!
*********
(TLB) published this article from Babylon Bee in the hope that Dr. Fauci would read it and it would help him to get over his compulsion to start giving an interview the second he sees a Red Light come on. (Last time he really looked stupid talking to a Stop Light.)
Anytime you are short on nonsense we encourage you to visit the Babylon Bee.
••••
••••
Stay tuned to …
••••
The Liberty Beacon Project is now expanding at a near exponential rate, and for this we are grateful and excited! But we must also be practical. For 7 years we have not asked for any donations, and have built this project with our own funds as we grew. We are now experiencing ever increasing growing pains due to the large number of websites and projects we represent. So we have just installed donation buttons on our websites and ask that you consider this when you visit them. Nothing is too small. We thank you for all your support and your considerations … (TLB)
••••
Comment Policy: As a privately owned web site, we reserve the right to remove comments that contain spam, advertising, vulgarity, threats of violence, racism, or personal/abusive attacks on other users. This also applies to trolling, the use of more than one alias, or just intentional mischief. Enforcement of this policy is at the discretion of this websites administrators. Repeat offenders may be blocked or permanently banned without prior warning.
••••
Disclaimer: TLB websites contain copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We are making such material available to our readers under the provisions of “fair use” in an effort to advance a better understanding of political, health, economic and social issues. The material on this site is distributed without profit to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving it for research and educational purposes. If you wish to use copyrighted material for purposes other than “fair use” you must request permission from the copyright owner.
••••
Disclaimer: The information and opinions shared are for informational purposes only including, but not limited to, text, graphics, images and other material are not intended as medical advice or instruction. Nothing mentioned is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.
Leave a Reply